Shark Bites: Dicers 1 Sharks 1
Coach General Taoli, Slicers and Bad Dicers

Plank Laid out Stiff as a Board: Bonestealers 2 Flesh 0
Coach Nygrell Grimskull, Brimstone Bonestealers

The sheer experienced gristle of the Brimstone Bonestealers roster told against the confident Creeping Flesh, who were fresh off their Spike! Tournament win in a brutal slugfest of the bandaged titans.

The Bonestealers won the coin toss, and opted to receive the kickoff. A strong front line, including Mummy Dus Nel-Etgath recently returned to the lineup after a successful off-season surgery, pushed back the Flesh front -- with Dus knocking out Flesh Mummy Plank in the process -- while the ball, landing in the wide zone near the sideline, was scooped up by veteran Bonestealer Wight Murken Shadowspike and protected by a small group of teammates. The Flesh deep defense quickly advanced, along with the wide guard, to engage the ball carrier and his escorts in a tangled melee. The Bonestealer center managed to beat back the Flesh, though, and the freed Mummy Dus blitzed towards the sideline to assist the ball carrier. Murken Shadowspike managed to blitz free and press on into the Flesh half, with most of the Flesh team tied up in melee. However, Flesh Zombie Rotten, with an assist from Skeleton Rattler, managed to take down the Bonestealer Wight and, to everyone's surprise, catch the bouncing ball.

Bonestealer Wights Rackis Skullrattle and Dagoth Shiverspine quickly closed in through a gap opened up in the center melee, but only managed to push Rotten back. In a daring move, Rotten blitzed back against the bullying Wight, knocked him down, and advanced towards the scrimmage line as fast as its rotten legs could carry. The Wights caught up with him, though, through some careful maneuvering, and finally knocked him over, the ball falling to the ground beside. Flesh Ghoul Deranged attempted to dodge away from the melee to pick up the fallen ball but was tripped up by Bonestealer Ghoul Fangmouth Earchewer. Murken Shadowspike, back on his feet, blitzed the now-standing Rotten to the ground again and grabbed the loose ball, advancing once again towards the Flesh end zone, this time escorted by Fangmouth. With the entire Flesh team (not known for their agility) tied up in melee with Bonestealer players, a touchdown looked almost certain. Nevertheless, Flesh Zombie Leper attempted to dodge away and take down the Bonestealer ball carrier, only to be foiled (and badly hurt) by the wily Bonestealer Skeleton Twinkle Phalanges and one of his amazing flying tackles, for which he became notorious at the very end of the Dragon Cup Final last season against the now-retired Crypt Crusaders.

The Bonestealers looked sure to score, with the clock winding down in the first half, when rookie Bonestealer Skeleton Tenphut Radius took himself down in a heap of bones tossing a badly placed block at Rotten. The Flesh had one last chance to stop the touchdown, but Ghoul Deranged only managed to push Murken Shadowspike further downfield. With only a minute to spare, the Bonestealers tossed a couple more blocks and Murken Shadowspike ran in the touchtown to make the score 1-0. With only a few seconds left on the clock, the two teams lined up again on the scrimmage line. The Flesh made a few blocks, getting the fans on their feet by knocking out Bonestealer Mummy Anoth Tset just before the whistle blew.

Anoth returned to the field at the beginning of the second half, although the Referee, obviously having difficulty counting, only let the Bonestealers field 10 players. This time receiving, the Flesh made a very strong drive down the wide zone, meeting stiff Bonestealer resistance but still pushing forward. At a crucial moment, however, when Bonestealer Ghoul Mad Dog Marrowlips was about to take down the Flesh ball carrier from behind, he was distracted by a cute cadaver on the sidelines and missed his target completely, an easy tackle for Flesh Ghoul Disturbed. Taking full advantage of this error, the Flesh surged forwards down the wide zone, Disturbed coming within a few yards of the Bonestealer end-zone with the ball, the scrum left some ways behind.

The Bonestealers managed to get a couple players back, though, and Skeleton "The Shadow" Nose blitzed Disturbed to the ground, out cold, and managed somehow to pick up the ball in the bargain. Rejoicing, the Bonestealer mummy Dus Nel-Etgath lay into his Flesh counterpart Plank with a mighty double-fisted haymaker, knocking the Flesh mummy's head clean off and into the wildly cheering crowd. (While Flesh press releases state that Coach Evil 1 did everything he could to hold the animating magic in place, close sources say he was so stunned by this turn of events that he simply "forgot" to regenerate the Mummy.) To add insult to injury, the now-headless Plank rose up seconds afterwards and shuffled off to the sidelines to join the Bonestealer roster.

The Flesh attempted to recover the ball, with two of their veteran Wights rushing Nose's protective escort, but failed to make any headway. Zombie Decay, however, extracted some small measure of vengeance on the Bonestealers by fouling Mad Dog Marrowlips, sending him off badly hurt. Dus was not quite finished yet, though, and blitzed into the Flesh's other Mummy, Rigor Mortis, knocking him out cold [Ed: Coach Evil 1 was heard muttering "There seems to be something wrong with our bloody Mummies today"]. With no Mummies, no ball, and outnumbered on the field, the Creeping Flesh position was looking very grim indeed. The Bonestealers handed off the ball to Murken Shadowspike who ran it upfield, while the remainder of the squad gave no quarter, continuing to pound the remaining Flesh players. Twinkle Phalanges stopped two desperate attempts to leave the melee and take down the ball carrier, while Murken Shadowspike handed the ball off to Ghoul Fangmouth Earchewer to make the final run from scrimmage line to the Flesh end-zone, scoring just before the whistle blew ending the game, 2-0 Bonestealers.
 

What Worth a Rat's Ass? Blighters 4 Machine 2
Coach Plaguelord Puswort, Blue Blighters

Under ideal skies and 79,000 maddened fans the Frog Machine faced of against the Blue Blighters. The Blighters were looking with some trepidation to their first game in the big leagues but were wanting to spill some blood of the heretical Frog clan. A contract dispute had the Machine's best player Skratsquick Terzo pouting on the sidelines but the rest of the team had little patience for such grandstanding.

The Blighters broke open a hole and caged down the south wide zone but left the cage door open allowing Krasslik Setzmo to blitz the ball away from gutter runner Slipps, stunning him. A scrum developed around the ball until an ill-advised block by linerat Skars against a few Machine storm vermin found himself flat on his back. This opportunity was quickly taken by rat ogre Rendflesh Salivar who vicously gutted storm vermin Skitters who was deemed DOP (dead on the pitch) but through the famous warpstone paste and wet hay concoction of the Blighters apothecary was patched up on the spot. The confusion let the Machine's star thrower Kaskat Sesto toss a lovely spiral up to StormVermin Throtvile Primo who shrugged off a few blocks while the rest of the team pummeled the Blighters thinned line, sending Linerat Gnashit off badly hurt and knocking out Slipps. Throtvile then scored easily with no defenders nearby.

The Blighters tried again to break through the wide zone but rookie thrower Chukks, over-excited in his first game, mis-threw the ball at his mentor, Skuppers feet. The ball was snatched up by the swift Gutter Runner Skrequal Sezdimo who, for his audacity, was driven into the turf by a nasty blitz and stunned. In a sweet play that had the Blighter fans on their feet and squeeking shrilly Skuppers showed how it was done with a sizzling pass to Stormvermin Leapsies who trotted off to the end zone, tying the game. A quick snap caught the Blues off-guard but then an out-of-control Rendflesh, who was trying to throw some unfortunate linerat into the stands, overbalanced and fell over! The Machine were then of the receiving end of a stout beating along the scrimmage line as Skrequal made a run for it along the wide zone only to be stripped of the ball into the stands which the crowd threw back to the Blighters. Dextrous lineman Skritchit threw a pass which was handed off to Klawfs who danced into the end zone as the whistle blew for the first half.

The second half started off disastrously for the Blighters as Rendflesh roared toward the hapless lineman Klawfs who was still signing autographs. The Rat Ogre tore off poor Klawfs head and downed it in a single bite. Covered in gore the mutated beast screamed a gutteral victory cry and licked his fingers clean. Unfortunately ol' Throtville wasn't watching his footing and tripped over the twitching corpse and fell down in a mist of blood and fear-musk. Yelling "Crissitunity!" the Blighters pummeled two Frog Worshipers into the infirmary and jumped on the ball. They caged around team captain Skuppers and fended off attacks and scored to avenge their fallen comrade who was ceremoniously thrown into a bog behind the stadium.

The Machine had clearly been given a talking to (or whipping from) their coach as Rendflesh tore a hole through the intimidated defenders who were unable to break the cage and the long legged Skrittar Quzro ducked behind the rampaging Rat Ogre to score. The Machine braced for the return hoping to stymie the Blighter offence and tie the game. Not to be outdone by his counterpart, Rat Ogre Mittens ran at and seriously injured Kaskat Sesto who was patched together by the Frog medic. The Blighters caged in the lower wide zone and were beaten upon mercilessly losing a man to the infirmary. Then Mittens went berserk throwing the Blues off-guard as packmasters tried to whip the him back on the field. Rendflesh, clearly excited by his frenzied counterpart smashed Slipps over his knee, breaking Slipps leg and sending him off the pitch in agony. Meanwhile the other Gutter Runner Snukkit was fending off several attacks with better success and held on to the ball.

The packmasters managed to point Mittens toward the doomed Thrower Kaskat Sesto who was killed by the cruel fangs of the mighty Rat Ogre. Dismay rippled through the crowd as this longtime favorite of the Frog fans was carted off to a ditch to rot. After the standard Skaven period of mourning (ie. none) the Blighters ran the reverse play and tried to get into a scoring position. In a clash of the mangy titans the two Rat Ogres went rato-a-rato with a fury of strikes and blows that would (and have) crushed lesser opponents to furry jelly. Mittens came out on top with a classic Skaven maneuver of a kick to the groin which the Frog Machine packmasters say will take at least a week to heal. Meanwhile Snukit was able to traipse into the end zone unmolested bringing and end to a bloody game which fans will be talking about for some time.
 

Bomb Ba-Bomb-Bomb: JavaBowl 6.8a Released!

JavaBowl 6.8a has been released and can now be obtained in the downloads section... you should get it because it has bombs. Secret bombs. So, you know.  That's good... right?

• Added the BOMB secret weapon. See the readme.txt file and zSecretWeapons rosters for usage. .
• See bugzilla on the FUMBBL site for more bug fixes in this patch.

(It's the bomb)
 

Hump Day Bloodletting: Wednesday Nov. 5th

Dance of the Mad Bastards: Steins 2 Drakkar 1

The sun was high in the sky as the Blood Drakkar faced off against the Frothy Steins during their well attended midday match.  The favoured Steins won the toss and received the first kick, and immediately the two teams brawled at midfield as the Steins tried to push forward straight up the middle in Dwarf-fashion against the fiercely resisting Drakkar. Control of the ball was disputed but the Steins held firm, and the magnificent HarryPalms saw an opening and took it, taking the ball with him, easily brushing off his pursuers to score the first touchdown at the middle of the half, understudy Bumpy running a close escort. The Drakkar received on the return drive and pushed forward, mixing it up at close quarters with the stumpy Steins, who managed to delay the Drakkar around the line of scrimmage, tying them up in pointless fighting which lasted until the halftime whistle, the Drakkar having progressed barely a dozen yards into the Steins' zone. Receiving in the 2nd half, the Drakkar this time managed to slip veteran catcher Odin Bellegaf up the wide zone, the rest of the team tangling up the Steins defence as Odin raced deep.  HarryPalms played safety, just barely catching Odin before the end zone, tripping him up and stealing away the ball. HarryPalms ran forward, straight up the middle of the field, through the melee, as Bumpy went long, deep into the unguarded Drakkar zone. HarryPalms moved up unimpeded and tossed a quick pass to Bumpy, who ran in to score the second touchdown. On the next kick, the Drakkar executed the same play as before, with Odin slipping up the wide zone with the ball, HarryPalms moving once again to intercept and Bumpy dodging away from the line to try and hit Odin, succeeding only in pushing him towards the sideline. Blitzer Bjorn Cinematograf came to the rescue, blind-siding Bumpy and pushing him into the crowd with a series of frenzied attacks, clearing the way for Odin to run into the Steins end zone, bringing the score to 2-1. With less than a 3rd of the half remaining, disaster almost befell the Steins as Bumpy failed to pick up the Drakkar kick and the Drakkar exploited a hole in the line to rush several players into the Steins back field. The Steins were able to recover the ball and avoid the Drakkar rush, HarryPalms receiving at midfield as the Steins ran out the clock, victory assured.  In the heavy fighting in the last minutes of the game, the Drakkar lineman Erik Bathyscaf suffered a gouged eye and veteran lineman Mats Lagaf suffered a smashed collarbone, an injury sure to leave him in a weakened state. The final whistle blew on a well fought Steins 2-1 victory.
 

Motion Rotation: Vikings 3 Bakers 0

A second Norse team played last night in Division C, the rookie Screaming Vikings going head to head against the rookie Bloodpie Bakers. With a decent crowd of 39,000 in attendance, the Bakers kicked to the Vikings, who rushed up the undefended wide zone, catcher Runforrestrun evading attacks from the Bakers defence and dodging nimbly by to run the ball into the end zone, getting the Vikings on the scoreboard early.  The Bakers received the Vikings kick on the return drive, but hobgoblin Tenderloin could not get a grasp of the ball and was stunned by charging Vikings, blitzer Riplagorgeson completing the turn over by stealing the ball and running deep into the Bakers' undefended back field, scoring the Viking's second touchdown. The Vikings were energized by their success and blitzed the Bakers on the next kick, completely disrupting the Bakers' play, blitzer Kicklecouillesson bringing bull centaur Blood Shot to the ground, fracturing his leg. Finally blitzer Punchlenezson robbed the Bakers of the ball and dashed for the end zone, scoring a third touchdown for the Vikings. Down to only 8 players to the Vikings full squad, the Bakers received the first kick of the 2nd half, but another failed ball pickup left them at a disadvantage once more as blitzer Punchlenezson raced in to pick it up. The bakers' resolve strengthened after finally inflicting some casualties of their own, lineman Clifson being badly hurt and catcher Catchlaballeson knocked out cold, and they went after the ball with a fury, knocking Punchlenezson down and rendering blitzer Stumplafaceson unconscious.  The ball loose once more, the two teams scrapped for control, both sides having some trouble ball handling. The Vikings slowly managed to coax the ball towards the Bakers end zone by degrees. However, just when things looked to be at their worst, hobgoblin Surloin the Hobby got to his feet and chased down lineman Normson who was headed for the end zone with the ball and brought him down with a spectacular tackle. Once again, neither team could get a grip on the ball, and as both teams rushed reinforcements in, chaos dwarf Roller amazingly managed to grab the loose ball at the sideline, hauling back to fire it up-field to his chaos dwarf teammate Sausage Maker, who, of course, failed to catch it... it was enough to prevent the score though, and the final minutes wound down on a 3-0 Vikings victory, the Bakers having redeemed their brutal 1st half by holding the Vikings scoreless in the second despite the disparity in numbers.

A full report of the games events can be found here.
 

Blood on the Pitch: Tuesday Nov. 4th

Hogtied: Barnacles 2 Mates 2

A teeming crowd of 49,000 turned out to watch the Tuesday morning match between the Blistering Barnacles and the Styg's Mates in what would turn out to be a bloodless draw. The Barnacles received first and threw all their weight on one flank against the Mates 3-4-4 deep defence, caging loosely around skink Nefarious Ned juts across the line of scrimmage, holding formation and breaking out the cage to allow Ned to reach the goal line where he was sacked by speedy catcher One-Eyed Willy... Ned got to his feet and reclaimed the ball, however, and despite the Mates closing in on him he dodged his way through them to score. On the return drive, the Mates forced there way straight up center field, eschewing the flanks, whereupon the Barnacles defence promptly crushed in their cage, sparking a melee which ball-carrier One-Eyed Willy managed to dodge out of with the ball, evading his pursuers and scoring a tying touchdown. The Mates anticipated the Barnacles weighted offence with a prefect defence, stopping the drive cold at the line of scrimmage before the halftime whistle blew. The Mates executed a quick snap on their reception in the 2nd half, duking it out at the line of scrimmage until One-Eyed Willy found the break he needed to sprint to the Barnacles end zone, loitering for a minute or two before scoring just after the midpoint in the half. The Barnacles wasted no time in driving back, exploiting the wide zone and handing the ball off to nefarious Ned who rapidly scored, bringing the final tally to 2-2. The Mates final scoring bid was stopped by the energetic Barnacles defence, and the clock wound down on a draw match.
 

Pain is so Close to Pleasure: Flamboyants 3 Babes 1

The Horny Babes were running late as the Rongeurs Flamboyants prepared to kickoff on Tuesday night. The Babes hurried into position with only 8 players on the pitch as the kick flew threw the air, and got off to a wobbly start, losing beastbabe Eulfspider badly hurt in the first minutes, and losing the ball as beastbabe Cutey Groteska seemed unable to pick it up before the Flamboyants charged into the back field to sack her, Skaven thrower Tulo Rat retreiving the ball to score the first touchdown. Finally fielding a full roster, the Babes received and drove forward with determination, concentrating on crippling the Skaven players, a strategy which bore fruit as rat ogre GrrRaaaT went down badly hurt by the horns of Gora the Impaler, followed by teammates NecplusUlt Rat taken out with a fractured leg and Tulo Rat badly hurt before the halftime whistle blew. The Flamboyants, reduced to nine players, nevertheless managed to exploit their speed advantage to to score quickly on the opening kick of the 2nd half, gutter runner Dilate La Rat getting credit for the second touchdown. The Babes executed a quick snap on the next kick, driving forward to ruthless beat upon their foe, while moving up deliberately with the ball, knocking 3 Flamboyants unconscious as they advanced, Gutsy Gutripper hadning off the ball to Bloody Bombshell who ran in for the touchdown. The Flamboyants received and again drove forward like lightning, Dilate La Rat scoring again to make it 3-1 but linerat Rat Chitique had to be carried off with a groin strain. With only minutes left on the clock, the Flamboyants jumped the gun on their next kick, fleeing the line of scrimmage and retreating deep into their own zone to avoid further punishment. The final whistle blew on a 3-1 Flamboyants victory, despite the extreme pounding suffered on the field.
 

March of Pain: March 2 Inaccurate 0

It was the classic conflict of orcs vs humans as the Funeral March took the field against the Dead-on Ball Inaccurate in their season home-opener. The Inaccurate kicked first, the March's superior weight showing as they scrapped at the scrimmage line.  A daring blitz by catcher Rye, however, resulted in control passing to the Inaccurate as lineman 16 picked up the ball that bounced from orc thrower Golden Arm's hands and successfully executed a very difficult pass up to Rye who had turned to go long. The March quickly squelched the play, however, sacking Rye before he could get much further and regaining the ball.  The humans could not seem to match the orcs for strength and cohesion and most of the Inaccurate roster spent it's remaining time in the half on their backs, while March blitzer Hard Hitter received the ball and ran for the end zone pushing lineman 1 out of the way to score in the final minute of the half.  Going on the offensive, the Inaccurate caged staunchly at centerfield, but were soon disrupted by the March who surrounded them, crushing the cage and forcing Rye to hand off to catcher P.D. who broke out early, only to be caught and stunned by blitzer Bone Crusher. Initiative thereafter passed to the March, who pushed 1 into the crowd where he suffered extensive injuries including a broken neck, soon joined in the apothecaries' tent by fellow lineman 8 with broken ribs and thrower Judas with a smashed collarbone. Despite the best efforts of the Inaccurate, the March were able to retain control, lineorc Six Fingers reaching the end zone with the ball to score the 2nd touchdown of the match in the closing seconds. The 2-0 March victory was a painful experience for the Innaccurate who responded by strengthening their roster by hiring two new blitzers, Comet and Rudolph the Drunk, both likely young lads.
 

Blood on the Dandelions: Flicks 2 Sonics 1

The second Division C game of the day was a lengthy contest between the rookie Sylvan SuperSonics and the stunty Picken Flicks.  The Sonics having played only one practice match together before their first competition match were a little rough around the edges, squandering an early opportunity to score in the first half after wresting control of the ball from the Flicks as catcher Greenwood the Great attempted to hand the ball off to a prone player.  Although the Flicks regained the ball, subsequent fighting saw it bounce into the surprised hands of ogre Olga, who examined it curiously without knowing what to do as the final seconds ticked away in the first half, watched by equally confused ogre Gates. The Sonics received in the second half and set up for a passing play, catchers Greenwood and Orgopher dashing towards the Flicks end zone.  After one abortive throw, Thranduilseed was just lining up to fire of a long pass that would certainly have netted a touchdown when ogre gates punched through the defensive cage and knocked him backwards where he tripped over goblin Graham who was hiding behind him. The speedy goblins of the Flicks retrieved the loose ball and after some effort goblin Glenn made it to the end zone score. Despite a FLicks blitz on the next kick, the Sonics managed to keep control, the catchers again going long, and this time Thranduilseed completing the long pass to Greenwood the Great who easily evaded the flicks defence to score the tying touchdown. With the game tied at 1-1 and with less than a quarter of the half remaining, goblin Steve came on with extra padding and a flight helmet which could only mean one thing... sure enough, after receiving the hand off from goblin Paul, he was picked up bodily by Gates and heaved through the air, hitting the ground running in the Sonics zone and sprinting into the end zone to score the winning touchdown before a single Sonic could move a muscle. The final minute of the half saw tragedy strike, as the two teams clashed with no hope of a score, promising young line-elf Maidenlorien was brutally killed by Gates as the ogre rampaged forward.  The Sonics first match was certainly a learning experience, and the Flicks pick up their first season victory.
 

Monday Night Bloodbowl: Monday Nov. 3rd

Chaos is as Chaos Does: Killers 2 Surly 1

The Short and Surly tackled the Mass Killers in a chaotic brawl of epic proportions in front of 48,000 fans.  After the Killers received the first kickoff, the two teams slugged it out at close quarters in the first half in a struggle that lasted almost the enitre half.  The Surly briefly wrested control of the ball from the Killers after knocking out three of their players, deep in their own zone late in the half, but lost it again to chaos warrior Dr. Menegele "Death Angel", who scored for the Killers with minutes to spare on the clock. Receiving in the 2nd half, Surly hobgoblin Fucker misjudged how quickly beastmen could charge and was shown the error of his ways by beastman Ben Laden who rushed into the Surly back field, head down, knocking Fucker on his ass and stealing the ball, while at the line of scrimmage beastman the Jackal put hobgoblin Assmonkey out of the game with a concussion.  The Surly responded by badly hurting beastman Chupacabra, and knocking Ben Laden flat, recovering the ball. The Surly attempted a reverse play, but were stymied by fast moving the Jackal. Another brawl developed as the two teams fought for the ball.  The Surly came out on top momentarily as bull centaur Hoofgrinder grabbed up the ball and charged forward, but he threw a shoe as he sprinted forward, knocking himself out as he fell. Still the two teams struggled on as the clock ticked away, but finally attrition told more heavily on the Surly, and with only 5 players left on the pitch they could not prevent Dens. B Lair from picking up the ball and handing off to Sara Fat who ran in to make it 2-0.  An exciting hard fought match with plenty of thrills and spills, Not Ori Ori surviving the match to everyone's surprise, including his own.
 

Powerhouse Stalemate: Smashers 1 Boozzhounds 1

The Drakehead Smashers faced off against the Putrid Swamp Boozzhounds in the 2nd of three Division B games last night. Black Orc grappled with Saurus as the two teams smashed together at the line of scrimmage, the Hounds receiving the Smashers kick. A fumbled pass by Hounds thrower Shooter opened the way for the Smashers, skink Godgiven exploiting a gap to steal the ball and speed for the Hounds end zone, scoring just before the middle of the half. The remainder of the half the two teams slugged it out, the Hounds trying to get the ball forward in the face of strong resistance, and ultimately coming out the worse for wear with two players out badly hurt and Shooter out with a gouged eye, with no score before the halftime whistle. Executing a perfect defence against the Smashers offence in the 2nd, the Hounds came out swinging, turning over Smashers possession after a sequence of failed pick ups and dropped passes, blitzer Jacky Dee brushing aside all in his path to run it in to the Smashers end zone for the tying touchdown. With half of the time remaining in the 2nd, the Smashers received and the two teams went at it again, and the two teams grappled mightily at the line of scrimmage, neither team giving way as skink Godbless looked for a way through, finding a wide gap by the sideline too late to make it into the end zone to score before the clock ran out, and in the closing seconds, tragedy struck the Smashers as blitzer Jacky Dee punted stunty skink Goddamn, crushing his rib cage, one rib piercing the little lizards heart, killing him. As the Smashers medical staff rushed onto the field, the final whistle blew on a 1-1 tie game. Goddamn became the second player killed in Season II... [Ed: Why does it always happen to the little guys? WHY? *shakes fist at heavens*]
 

Dancing Lessons: Videos 3 Harem 2

The third Monday night Division B game was a fast paced barnburner between the Straight to Videos and the Harem. With 48,000 fans in attendance, the Harem kicked off to their opponents who retrieved the ball and faded back conservatively. A wild throw up pitch turned over control to the Harem, but not for long, as barely had they moved past the line of scrimmage than the Videos reclaimed the ball, wardancer "Run, Forest Run..." passing the ball up to catcher "I love it when a plan comes together..." who scored making it 1-0. Driving back against a Videos perfect defence, thrower Val threw a perfect long pass into the arms of linewoman Vicki who blitzed into the end zone to score the tying touchdown with less than 2 minutes on the clock. Just as the Harem kicked off for the last kick of the first half, a horde of Harem fans stormed onto the pitch, stunning several Videos players before being beaten off, and the half ended without further incident.  Amazingly, at the start of the 2nd half just as the Videos kicked off the same fans invaded again, their numbers much reduced this time they succeeded only in stunning wardancer "These go to Eleven" before being chased off once more. The Harem drove up the weakened wide zone, switching to midfield as the Videos tried to smother the drive. "I love it when a plan comes together..." briefly challenged possession of the ball but was ultimately knocked flat, linewoman Sharon making a daring retrieval if the ball from under the noses of the Videos and sprinting into the end zone to score. Playing catch up now, the Videos completed another passing play, both wardancers and the catcher going deep to confuse the defence, the ball ultimately being passed up to "I love it when a plan comes together..." who scored to make it 2-2. The game was not over yet with one quarter of regulation time remaining, and the Videos kicked to the Harem, who drove into the Videos defence taking it deep into their opponents zone. A wild pass from Val that went into the crowd and was thrown back at midfield handed control back to the Videos on a silver platter and they took full advantage, line-elf "Are you talking to me?" grabbing it and tossing it up to "Run, Forest Run..." at the line of scrimmage, who dashed forward deep into the Harem's zone, outstripping his pursuers on long elven legs to score the winning touchdown with mere seconds on the clock, the whistle blowing on a 3-2 Videos victory.
 

Howling and Screaming: Howlers 1 Midgets 0
Coach Blarg Blargson, Mad Howlers

It was a SCORCHER down in Midget Town as the hometown favorite Screaming Midgets took the field against the visiting Mad Howlers. Both teams were fairly evenly matched going into the battle and both were looking forward to some heavy hand-to-hand combat. Having won the coin toss, the Howlers prepared to receive the kick off.

The Orks quickly caged in around thrower Blackheart, who threw a quick pass to Throatrip who quickly realized that the dwarven defense was a little thicker than he had thought, halting his advance. The dwarves came in fast and furious; laying a beating on the Howlers they are not likely to soon forget. A massive melee broke out at the midfield, the Orks trying everything to move the ball forwards. They faked up, they charged down, they doubled back; nothing was working as the minutes ticked away. In the final minute of the first half, Spleenlik doubled back, handed the ball off to thrower Blackheart who lunged forwards and made a quick pass to Blitzer Throatrip who quickly broke from the pack and dashed for the dwarfs end zone. In an uncharacteristic burst of speed, Longbeard Ferdinand Krafty closed with Throatrip as did Troll Slayer Right Said Fred who laid the Ork out cold before snatching up the ball as the whistle blew on a scoreless first half which left the dwarves with 2 players unable to go on and the Orks with 2 players refusing to wake up..

The second half started with a bang as Runner Longjohn Steammy quickly snatched up the ball and moved in behind his teammates who had engaged the Howlers in combat at the scrimmage line. The dwarves started pounding their way through but Blitzers Krotchkikk and Throatrip quickly circled around to attack the dwarven cage from behind. Realizing they were being caged in, the valiant dwarven offense sent lineorcs Gazbagg and Blackgums to the floor, punching a hole through the impressive wall of Orks in their way. Steammy was quick to run through but as he did so, he noticed he was going at it alone and quickly shouted back to runner Flinstone Hammer who dove and rolled out from beneath a pair of Ork Blitzers to dash through the same opening as Longjohn Steammy and provide him some assistance.

Ork Blitzers Spleenlik and Skullcrakk saw the dwarves escaping to the top of the field and, having been left behind by the surging wave of dwarves, charged back towards their own goal line with what started as a low growl and grew as they closed with the valiant dwarves. The Dwarven offense continued to pound into the Orks, in a wild brawl that tied up the bulk of both teams, again freeing up their runners, the dwarven duo looked at each other grimly as they saw the pair of Orks howling as they closed. With a simple nod, the plan was enacted, Longjohn continued his mad dash for the goal line while Flinstone Hammer ran towards the Ork Blitzers determined to stop them.

Spleenlik dodged around Hammer to the right and caught up with Steammy, nipping at his heels. Skullcrakk, widely considered the rising young star of the Howlers, let rip with a "WAAAARRRRGH!!!" that echoed through the stadium. He quickly ran around Hammer on the left and, like the winner of the "Momma McGee's Ork Chili fest" heading for the outhouse, tore a blazing streak down the field and slammed full force into Longjohn Steammy, sending him into the stands and sending the ball a few meters away towards the line of scrimmage. Blargson shouted orders from the dugout, warning his players not to touch the ball but to surround it. Fearing the Orks would recover the ball and end their drive, the dwarves turned on the heat: Longbeard Softy Granite quickly ducked around and saddled up next to Throatrip who was standing right next to the ball. This allowed Longbeard Pick Asunder to slam into Throatrip knocking him into the ball which bounced wildly, out of Throatrip hands, into Softy, off Softy into Pick, off Pick to the ground and as Pick lunged forward for the ball a second time, Ork Blitzer Throatrip, who hadn't been quite knocked over, reached out a long leg and tripped the little dwarf up.

Sensing a chance to regroup, the Orks moved onto the offensive again and quickly erected a wall of flesh between the dwarves and the ball, allowing Skullcrakk to swoop in a snatch up the ball. The dwarves tried everything to clamber over the wall of Orks, runner Longjohn Steammy managing to get right up behind Skullcrakk only to be slammed off the pitch by Blitzer Krotchkik who was running to help his teammate. Seconds later, it would be runner Flinstone Hammer would who desperately dash up behind Skullcrakk, only to be pushed off the pitch himself by Throatrip. Having cleared the way and with mere seconds left in the game, Blitzer Skullcrakk crossed the dwarven line and brought an end to this epic battle.
 

First Blood: Paladins 4 Hunt 0

Division A got off to a violent start yesterday afternoon as the Avelorn Paladins faced the Wild Hunt, the popularity of both teams ensuring a sizable turnout of 73,000 fans and religious fanatics. Both teams were fielding rookie additions to their rosters, the Hunt adding wardancer Wethylwych to the lineup to help relieve the pressure on wardancer Wychwethyl and catcher Sceolan who between them have scored 28 of the team's 33 touchdowns to date, and have garnered 10 of the team's 17 MVP awards. The Paladins for their part had hired a young line-elf named Bolgar the Hunter to fill out their sparse roster, barely able to field 11 with catcher Greyeagle in physiotherapy and not dressing for the game. As expected, the game was fast-paced and high scoring, the Hunt losing the ball to the Paladins midway through the first half after several abortive attempts to move the ball up, the Paladins quickly capitalizing on the turnover, with rookie Bolgar the Hunter receiving the handoff and running in to score. The Paladins maintained the pressure, blitzing on the next kick, disrupting the Hunt offence already weakened by unconscious players (most significantly Wychwethyl) from the previous drive. After a line-elf Otsea dropped a pass at midfield, the Paladins once again taking full advantage, stealing the ball and performing a pass-handoff combination play that saw lion warrior M.K. Klaw picking up the second touchdown with minutes reamining in the half.

The 2nd half saw the Hunt bolstered by their treeman, Fangorn, who finally roused himself in time for the kickoff, but Wychwethyl remained unconscious [Ed: for all his star power, he is known for his glass jaw and his ability to take long rests recovering] as the Paladins received and drove up the wide zone against the Hunt deep defence. The Paladins were not slowed, however, as M.K.Klaw dodged past line-elf Nelya2 on the sideline to score the 3rd Paladins touchdown only minutes into the half. Determined, the Hunt received and executed a quick snap, their offensive getting off to a good start with opposing line-elf Thorndyke being carried off the pitch badly hurt by a tremendous swipe from one of Fangorn's limbs. Worse tragedy struck minutes later as the promising young Bolgar the Hunter was driven back towards the sideline by Otsea, and then hit by a blitz from Wethylwych which carried him off his feet and propelled him inot the stands, where he disappeared into a knot of Hunt fans bent on vengeance... when the crowd cleared it revealed Bolgar's broken and lifeless body, a promising career, with a touchdown to his credit already in his first game, cut short by the bloodthirsty adherents of some ultra-violent Sceolan-cult fringe sect.  As the Paladins were stunned and horrified, the Hunt made their play for a score, Wethylwych leaping over the defenders and racing for the end zone, only to be caught by the quickly recovering Paladins defence, line-elf The Farzan catching him and knocking the ball from his hands and into the crowd, who threw it back in at midfield. The Paladins got to the ball first and drove into the Hunt's end for the fourth time, dragon warrior Silent Service scoring the fourth and final Paladins' touchdown late in the half. Wychwethyl still sleeping, the Hunt tried one last running play, Wethylwych blitzing through the Paladins defence, but again he was stymied, Silent Service knocking him to the ground. With that, the final whistle blew, the Paladins gaining a 4-0 victory at high cost.

Bolgar the Hunter becomes Season II's first victim, his first game also his last...
 

More Screaming: The Screaming Vikings Join the League!

Everyone welcome the 12th team in Division C and the 36th team to join the league's current season, the Screaming Vikings.  A Norse team, they are coached by the dynamic duo of Siegfried & Montecore, and join Frog Conference, inserted into the Division C schedule where the ugly "BY"s were... thus, the Vikings first opponent was the previously matchless Bloodpie Bakers.  Should be a good one!
 

Weekly Rag: BloodSports Illustrated

Our second feature, a weekly newsletter of highlights, predictions, and statistics, has produced it's first, somewhat truncated issue.  It can be found here.  Issues will be produced in PDF and provide a high level, sports coverage style overview of the league.  As a supplemental to this short first issue, I will be creating an analysis of last season's games, teams, and players which may be of minor interest, and I hope to post it in the next week or so.
 

Blackened Nipples: Desir 3 Cadavers 1

The second Division C game last night was played between the Noir Desir and the Nipply Cadavers, both teams well matched on paper. A teeming crowd of 45,000 watched the initial kick, the Cadavers executing a perfect defence that turned out to have some flaws after all as the Desir streamed into their rear through the wide zones.  The Cadavers did their best to squelch the drive as witch elf Claudia Demonia crossed the line of scrimmage, driving up the wide zone and then faking back and across to pass up to with elf Angela Del Muerta, who unfortunately was knocked flat by the Cadaver defence in the form of Chewlips "Fresh Fresh" Spurtz, who himself went down after tripping over Angela. Claudia swept in to reclaim the ball, this time handing off to open line-elf Nasser El Barbudo, who ran into the Cadavers end zone to score the first touchdown of the match. The Cadavers retaliated with a successful return drive, as the team powered through the Desir defence, the ball carried securely up the pitch by Chewlips, who effortless blocked the last ditch attack of Angela Del Muerta, stunning her then running in to score the tying touchdown. With ample time left, the Desir drove back, Claudia Demonia carrying the ball up the field and stunning Chewlips to run unopposed into the Cadavers end zone just before the halftime whistle.

The Cadavers received in the second and drove into the Desir ranks, but the offensive quickly lost cohesion and disaster struck when good old Chewlips (he seems to so all the work) tried to barge his way through blitzer Vlad El Negro, only to have Vlad turn the tables on him, knocking him to the ground. The ball rolled loose and the Desir pounced on the opportunity, muscular line-elf Ma Lhin knocking mummy Threepleye "Sticky Bitz" Abzhorbuntzie to the ground and recovering the ball. In the ensuing fight, Chewlips was badly hurt after being tripped, and Ma Lhin blitzed his way clear, while the Desir cut the Cadavers defence into pieces, keeping them dominated in detail and inflicting severe punishment on the undead.  Ma Lhin loitered on the goal line as the clock ran down and the Cadavers casualties mounted, easily fending off the last desperate rushes the few remaining Cadavers on the field made, until, with seconds to spare, he stepped into the end zone to bring the score to 3-1.

The Cadavers face Dark Elves for a second time in a row in their second match next week, this time in the form of much weaker conference-mates, the Spermosaurs.
 

Shorthanded Scrimmage: Spermosaurs 2 Shorty 1

Division C action kicked off last night with the Spermosaurs facing off against the Get Shorty, both teams suffering manpower shortages and fanbase problems, a mere 15,000 fans truning out for the match, and most of those seemed to be more interested in fighting each other than in watching the match as a a massive riot was sparked just as the two teams squared off for the first kick, and it was not until 3/4s of the first half regulation time had elapsed that the pitch was cleared enough to play. Both teams had been mauled in pre-season exhibition play, the Spermosaurs having lost two line-elves and the Shorty having lost their minotaur, and thus both teams fielded shorthanded squads. The remaining minutes of the first half were not heartening, as first the shorty failed to pick up the ball, and then in short order, bull centaur Fritz got tangled up with line-elf Fubar (who suffered broken ribs in the altercation), and witch elf GrandPa Smurf butted heads with hobgoblin Tog, both players going down in a heap, GrandPa Smurf stunned and Tog carried off the pitch badly hurt.  The halftime whistle blew on the wreckage of the 1st half, both teams now even weaker than before.

The Shorty fielding 9 effectives and the Spermosaurs fielding 8, the Shorty kicked at the outset of the 2nd half, the Spermosaurs receiving and getting the ball to GrandPa SMurf who dashed up the wide zone only to trip on a blade of grass deep in Shorty territory. Bull centaur Fritz galloped in to pick up the ball and fired it upfield, his intended target, hobgoblin Pog, sadly missing the pass which went slightly wide.  The Spermosaurs line-elf Jag could not steal the ball, however, being tripped up by chaos dwarf Zvektor, and Pog was able to recover it and dash for the end zone, scoring early in the half. The Shorty blitzed on their next kick, but the kick went wild and the Spermosaurs got the ball to GrandPa Smurf who sprinted for the SHorty end zone unopposed, managing to keep on his feet this time, scoring the tying touchdown just after the halfway mark. The SHorty executed a quick snap on the next drive and passed the ball up to Fritz, but Grandpa Smurf ambushed the bull centaur and brought him down, stunning him with an elbow drop, and knocking the ball into the crowd, who threw it back in way across the field in Shorty territory. Hobgoblin Nog failed to pick it up and was rushed by two Spermosaur line-elves, who knocked him to the ground, line-elf Jag scooping up the ball and jogging into the Shorty end zone to score the winning touchdown.  With no time remaining, the Spermosaurs blitzed the Shorty and the two teams melee'd at the line of scrimmage until the final whistle blew, separating the combatants.

Both embattled teams made good money from the match, owing in a large part to the looting of the bodies of numerous spectators killed in the extensive 1st half rioting, money which will go a long way towards both teams' recovery.!
 

Call out the Guard: Bloods 2 Divas 1

The DragonBBL II season opener between Division B the Banner Guard Bloods and the Lustria Divas Sunday afternoon drew an eager 75,000 screaming fans. The large crowd paid premium ticket prices for the privilege of watching the very first kickoff of the Fall Season.  The veteran Divas managed to dress their full roster despite their chronic injury problems, and put their best foot forward on the first kick, executing a quick snap and getting the ball to catcher Dawn who dashed up the wide zone, but the plan fell apart as the Bloods proved to be more than a match for the Amazon mobility, releiving Dawn of the burden of the ball and running a reverse play handoff that allowed line-elf Barbarossa to elude the Divas pursuing him with an impressive piece of footwork, only to look rather foolish as he slipped on a orange rind that had been careless thrown on the field just as he crossed the goal line, the ball squirting out of his hands and into the crowd who helpfully threw it at midfield. The two teams scrapped for the ball at midfield, neither side managing to keep control of the ball for more than a minute at a time, and the play see-sawed in a comedy of dropped passes and failed pickups. Finally attrition told on the Divas, with 3 players out KO'd and one blitzer down with a pinched nerve, and they were not able to prevent line-elf Rommel from getting his hands on the ball, tossing a quick pass to rookie lion warrior Charles who sprinted into the Divas end zone unopposed with seconds remaining in the first half to score the season's first touchdown.

Stung by the upstart Bloods the Divas came out swinging in the 2nd half, blitzing the Bloods offence, driving hard towards phoenix warrior Napoleon, but once again the Bloods proved more vigorous. Using the divide and conquer technique that worked so well in the first half, the Bloods offensive line was able to create a clear lane for Napoleon to move up and pass to Charles who, well screened by his teammates who let nothing through, ran in to score his second touchdown. On the next drive, the Divas drove forward somewhat sluggishly, and the Bloods exploited the wide zones to rush thrower Stacey in force... the tactic left their own flank weak, however, and Stacey easily dodged away from her would-be attackers to fire a pass up to Dawn, who, in turn, faked out Charles who was sprinting in to intercept, and got by to score for the Divas.  Determined to put the game out of reach, the Bloods executed another quick snap on the next drive, but their drive was nearly completely smothered when line-elf Davout failed to pick up the ball, and linewoman Molly beat him to it, grabbing the ball and firing it across the field to Dawn, but the pass went wild and flew into the bleachers.  The fans threw the ball in to the Bloods end zone, where the Bloods recovered it, phoenix warrior Wellington passing it to Charles, and as Charles fended off a blitz by Molly, it became apparent that neither team had time to develop any meaningful play, and a the two teams took their final jabs at one another (with blitzer Lita suffering a concussion after a nasty trip), the final whistle blew on regulation time and the game ended, a 2-1 Bloods victory.

The Bloods are off to a great start, defeating what is certainly one of the tougher teams in the conference.  The Divas injury woes continue with two more vital blitzers being carried off the pitch in agony... their situation will not likely improve as they will face the bloodhungry Horny Babes next week, minus their casualties from this match.  The road gets rockier!
 

At Long Last: New Team and Division C Schedule

The 11th team has joined Division C... everyone welcome the Bloodpie Bakers, sturdy Chaos Dwarves coached by the indefatigable Phoenix!

With the 11th team comes the new Division C Schedule.  It is identical in structure to the Division A and B schedules except the absence of 1 team has created "BY" matches each week.  If a 12th team join the league (which I sincerely hope will happen) in the next week or so, those ugly red "BY" matchups will be replaced by them and all will be happy and good.  In the absence of a 12th team, the teams of Dragon conference will play one extra match and the the teams of Frog conference will play two extra matches, against randomly determined opponents at mid season.

If there is one more individual out there with the gumption to compete in the League, then your team will be accepted on a first come first serve basis.  Step right up, step right up!  Test your strength!  Win a bucket of imaginary cash!
 

Please Stand By: Technical Difficulties

Division C Schedule has been taken down again due to some unforseen conflicts.  Dratted 10 team schedule!
 

Reach for the Wooden Bowl: Division Schedule C and Post-Season Stuff

First and best of the good news, Division C Schedule has been posted. Note that it differs somewhat from the other schedules in that each team plays a third game against two randomly determined opponents from their own conference, and a second game against a randomly determined opponent from the other conference to fill out the 16 game regular season schedule.

Secondly, the post-season schedule has been posted along with rules encompassing the new value of the respective trophies.  Division C will be competing for the coveted Wooden Bowl, a prize of no intrinsic value except that it happens to be filled with cash.  The Soapy Cup has gotten a nice boost in value, and the DragonBowl base value has been mildly increased.

Lastly, the Advancement/Relegation rules governing how teams move between divisions and also All-Star ProBowl format has been added to the season rules.  Basically each Division will hold it's own All-star match... no one will feel left out this time!
 

Equal Rights for Undead Wights: Dead Zone Empowers the Late Ladies

Just to make Blarg Blargson's day, a new Undead team has joined Division C.  Everyone welcome the Dead Zone, coached by the deadpan necromancer Dead Man Walken. Appropriately emerging from the graveyard on this Hallowed Eve, the largely female roster of the Zone strikes a blow for the empowerment of the dearly departed fairer sex. Welcome to the league!

With 34 teams total there is room for 2 more teams... if none are forthcoming by midday tomorrow the Division C schedule shall be posted in it's 10 team (5 per conference) configuration.
 

Season II Has ARRIVED! Mostly...

Division A and B Schedules are now prepared and posted. Division C schedule will wait a little while longer to give new coaches a chance to submit by the November 1st deadline (sorry Div. C guys!).  The Official season start is November 1st, but everyone can get started just as soon as they can schedule their matches.  Note that round 1 is an extra day long (for no good reason except it is the first round and hey why not?).  Rounds overlap on the Sunday of the week, to give some latitude.  Please try to play your games within the designated week, we all know real life intrudes of course, but if you know you are especially busy or are having trouble scheduling please designate a proxy, preferably a coach form a different division with no conflict of interest. Also note that round 8 is two weeks long to accommodate the inevitable delays caused by Christmas and New Years.

Coaches who want to borrow money before their first game, I will be posting the Loanshark rules later today or early Saturday, so never fear.  Also all coaches wishing to take advantage of the Major Surgery option please contact me to work out the details. Lastly I have not nullified any "missed games" for players from the rosters yet, so if you are in a hurry to play please feel free to delete them yourslef or contact me and I will do it for you.

Please inspect your schedule/standings/locker rooms and inform me if you spot any problems.  Everything is hot off the presses so you never know, better safe than sorry, eh what?  You can still take a gander at the Season I stuff here, so don't panic if you still wanted to look at old stats, results, and replays...

If anybody has complaints about their placement in this Division or that Conference T.S.! Everything was done in as fair a way as possible, taking into consideration team performance, rating, style, coach underwear size, etc.  Give the league the benefit of the doubt and play some Bloodbowl!  The schedule is as close to random as it can get (no more mirroring the 1st half of the season in the 2nd) and everyone should have 8 home and 8 away game.  If there are any issues there, please let me know.  Alright, that's it!  Kick BUM!
 

Further Expansion: Sonics Join the League

A new Wood Elf team, the Sylvan SuperSonics has joined the league, coached by the esteemed Blueberry Muffin, whose face has been the last thing many a deathmatcher has seen. The Sonics addition to the league brings the total number of teams to 33.

Additionally, read the heartfelt and intimate interview with Agamemnon the Horny of the Short and Surly, which can be found in Noskull's Corner!
 

Crouching Frog Eaten by Dragon: Dragon 4 Frog 2

The much anticipated Allstar match was played last night as a thronging record crowd of 292,000 competed for standing room, packing the stadium well above capacity.  The noise was deafening as the Dragon Conference Allstars and the Frog Conference Allstars filed onto the pitch, the names and stats of each star read in turn, a veritable litany of who's who in the DragonBBL world. The Church of Sceolan (Blessed Son of Nuffle) was present in full force, as was the Reformed Church of Sceolan (Nuffle Reborn), and the Holy Temple of Sceolan (Nuffle Incarnate), as well as numerous smaller sects, all handing out literature, recruiting membership, and of course, skirmishing with other sects. A few of the Dragon players were still in their personal dressing rooms as the two teams moved out to begin play, most notably the heavy hitters chaos warrior Poisons Ivy, mummy Tutenkarnage, bull centaur Hoofgrinder, and amazon blitzer China 2.0, all delayed for various personal grooming reasons. Head Coach Soapyfrog Nullset, confident of victory, decided to proceed without them saying "they snooze, they lose!"

The Frog Allstars kicked first, Dragon Skaven thrower Kaskat Sesto retrieving the ball and passing up to Dwarven runner HarryPalms at the line of scrimmage, but the Dragon drive quickly ran into trouble as Amazon blitzer Lita bounced off mummy Anoth "Big Mummy" Tset, leaving runner HarryPalms exposed to attack. The Frogs took full advantage, Human blitzer Barbossa running in to knock HarryPalms flat, the ball rolling away towards the sideline. Wood Elf catcher Sceolan zipped past saurus Stuart Runin on the sideline to grab the loose ball and dash into the Dragon's back field, but was stunned by witch elf Sum Dizzy Bitch who sprinted back to play safety. The ball spun away on the pitch again, and, after tripping up gutter runner Skratsquick Terzo who was trying to get to the ball, wardancer Wychwethyl blitzed forward, shoving Sum Dizzy out of the way, grabbing the ball and dodging away to dash into the end zone to score the matches first touchdown, giving the Frogs an early 1-0 advantage. Receiving again, Coach Soapyfrog decided to take no further chances, rooting his heavyweights out of their dressing rooms and fielding his full offensive line. The Dragon offensive knocked the Frog defence on it's collective ass as Sum Dizzy Bitch dashed forward with the ball, escorted by the Amazons Lita and China 2.0. Norse blitzer Geirroed Epitaf was nonetheless able to dash in to hit Sum Dizzy hard with the help of Barbossa, stunning her. Despite the setback, the Dragon offence continued, Hoofgrinder galloping in to stun Geirroed Epitaf, allowing Skratsquick Terzo to grab the ball and dash for the end zone. Wychwethyl managed to evade the interfering Dragon payers, however, and managed to make a crowd pleasing sprint to catch Skratsquick just short of the end zone... Skratsquick managed to keep his feet but Wychethyl managed to knock the ball from his hands just as he crossed the touchdown line, collecting it himself. His control of the ball was not long lived, however, as the Amazons closed in on him, and Sum Dizzy Bitch, shaking off her previous hit, sprinted in to hit him from the side, screaming "GRRL POWER!". Wychwethyl tried to fend off her frenzied attacks, but as he was pushed ever backwards, he lost his footing just as Sum Dizzy connected a sharp right cross, stunning him off his tree. With the ball lying in the end zone where Wychwethyl had dropped it, Skratsquick quickly scuttled over the wardancer's prone body, picking up the ball and spiking it to tie the game at 1-1.

With slightly less than half the time remaining in the first half, the Dragons kicked to the Frogs, who executed a quick snap, the unusually spry and hyperactive Anoth Tset leading the drive by lumbering forward and pushing Lita into the crowd with unexpected speed. Lita made it to the Dragon dugout in one piece as the Frogs drove forward, caging loosely around Wychwethyl who had received the ball, and the Elven catchers pushing far up the wide zone. The Dragons moved in to smother the drive, with Poison Ivy getting close enough to Wychwethyl to knock him off his feet with a single blow from her gauntleted fist. The Frogs did their best to clear away the interfering Dragon players, knocking Poison Ivy to the ground and badly hurting chaos dwarf Balin Bloodbrewer. Sceolan raced back along the sideline, evading the Dragons who tried to impede him, picking up the ball that Wychwethyl had dropped and handing it off to phoenix warrior Alex Hapsburg.  In the meantime, lion warrior M.K. Klaw dodged away from Hoofgrinder and ran into the end zone where he turned to receive, as Alex Hapsburg moved up and hauled back to fire off a pass. The pass looked good until wight Decom Poze leapt into the air and deflected the ball straight upwards. The crowd held it's breath as the ball reached the apex of it's flight and fell back down directly into Decom Poze's waiting arms. The crowd went wild as Decom Poze completed probably the most pivotal play of the game by running forward to hand off to Sum Dizzy Bitch, who crossed the line of scrimmage and made the long dash to the Frog end zone, scoring with only 30 seconds left on the clock. With so little time left before halftime, the Frogs decided to play their last card, and goblin Hyney Ken came on to the field with his fight suit and reinforced pads on, and the Dragon set up a cordon at goal line to screen against the fling play. As soon as the ball was kicked, gutter runner Hab Il Dlabal and Sceolan sprinted forward to double team beastbabe TaeraTak and open a gap in the Dragon screen that HyneyKen could exploit. Beastman Dens B. Lair recovered the kicked ball and ran forward, handing it off to the little goblin, who was immediately hefted up by massive ogre Paul Pot.  Paul Pot hauled back and threw, and Hyney Ken arced through the air deep into the Dragon's end, ball clasped in his arms. Hyney Ken hit the ground less than a dozen yards form the Dragon end zone, but his knees buckled with the force of the landing and he fell face first, losing his grip on the ball.  As he shook his head to clear it from the impact, the halftime whistle blew and the play ended.

The Frogs received again in the second half, the kicking Dragons executing a perfect defence. The Frog drive immediately bogged down as Anoth Tset got a little carried away, pushing Poison Ivy back and suddenly finding himself surrounded by enemies and knocked to the ground by a solid counterpunch from his intended victim. The Dragon took advantage of the blunder and surged forward, HarryPalms running into the Frog's end behind Hoofgrinder and recovering the Dragon kick, while the rest of the team pinned the Frogs at the line of scrimmage. The Frogs threw together a desperate defence to try and stop HarryPalms, but the stolid dwarf kept his feet in the face of his attackers, and as the Dragons flowed forward to assist, he put his head down and charged into Hab Il Dlabal, knocking the little ratman out cold, and then dodging away from the scrum to sprint into the end zone as fast as his stubby legs could carry him to score the 3rd Dragon touchdown. Dragon kicked again, and the Frogs charged forward, more desperate now to score, forcing their way up the wide zone in the face of stiff resistance. The two teams enaged in a fierce melee as the Frogs tried to move the ball forward until finally they managed to make enough room on the sideline for M.K. Klaw to hand off to Sceolan, who dashed for the end zone. Sum Dizzy Bitch leapt out of the struggling mass of players and chased down the speeding Sceolan, but Sceolan nimbly turned and fended off her attacks, parrying, dodging, and side-stepping as he danced backwards away form the frenzying witch elf, a dance which ended in the Dragon end zone where he defiantly spiked the ball to the massive cheers and chanting of his adherents in the stands. The score standing at 3-2 and with just over a quarter of the second half remaining, the Dragons received the Frog kick, Kaskat Sesto picking up the ball and passing up to skink Lerkin Sneek near the line of scrimmage, who ran forward, well protected by Poison Ivy, Stuart Runin, Hoofgrinder and Lita as the rearguard. The Frog circled back to interfere and Wychwethyl leapt into the cage to take a swing a Lerkin Sneek, but Lerkin neatly ducked under the wardancer's attack and Wychwethyl wound up losing his footing and going down. Hoofgrinder stepped forward to bat linerat Peste Toba out of the way, knocking him unconscious, and the way was clear for Lerkin Sneek to run the ball into the Dragon end zone in the final minutes, putting the game further out of reach for the Frog. Without real hope of victory, but hoping to salvage some pride in the form of a thrid touchdown, Head Coach Nygrell Grimskull ordered Hyney Ken to suit up once more. The Dragons punted into the far corner where Sceolan picked it up and ran forward to hand off to Hyney Ken. Paul Pot once again hefted the goblin in his mighty hand, and Hyney Ken sailed through the air, ball in hand.  Well, they say landing is the hardest part, and indeed, once again Hyney Ken hit the ground and lost his footing, the ball flying from his hands. The Dragons took their parting shots at the Frogs as the final seconds ticked down, Sum Dizzy Bitch blitzing forward to take revenge on Sceolan, who once again dodged and parried, keeping his feet despite Sum Dizzy's best efforts, eliciting cheers of pride and admiration from his follwers and converts.  With that, the final whistle blew on regulation time, and the Allstar ProBowl was awarded to Coach Soapyfrog Nullset and the stars of the Dragon Conference Allstar team, having scored an impressive 4-2 victory against their Frog opponents.

While the Dragon Allstars were united by their victory, the Frogs seemed to be suffering from some dissent post-match, many of Frog Conference's best and brightest feeling upstaged by the Wood Elf duo Sceolan and Wychwethyl, echoing in macrocosm some of the sentiments that seem to be felt by the other members of the Wild Hunt themselves. Although Sceolan may have many true followers (some say Nygrell Grimskull himself is among their number), his enemies also have begun to multiply... The ProBowl marked the end of the DragonBBL I Post-Season, and all teams are now training and healing for the DragonBBL Season II, which kicks off this coming Saturday November 1st.